A few days ago, Uni who was a popular(?) singer in Korea killed herself.
To see her the first time, of course, I just remember she acted a character who had princess disease on TV.
And, later, she entered my highschool, and she was my junior(of course, I didn't see her when she went to the school. I want to say just the same school.)
And the festival of school, I who was not interested in celebrities stared at her vacantly cause by her dancing. And, it made a deep impression on my mind....
But, why.... she had to die.....
A few years ago, actress Lee Eun-Ju also killed herself. She was one of my favorite actress, that's why I was shocked, but this time, Im not shocked such as Lee Eun-Ju.
But, just...
To kill herself makes me feel really sorry....
Suiside...
Are there anybody who had "Never" thought about SUISIDE???
Me???
For sure, I also had thought about suiside. Like you guys, in my highschool days...
A stress about to study, friend relationship, family, etc, I think not only me.....
I have a lot of memories about highschool, but it was true that i was really hard at that time.
Of course, nowadays, i just smile when I think about that.
When I serverd in the army once or twice, when I worked once(huk!!!! I didn't know it's so many.. .-0-)
Anyway, I sometimes think like that, but I think why I should kill myself... it's my recently mind...
That's the reason why I don't kill myself...
First, I have no courage to kill myself. Actually, is there any hard thing such as living in the life, in my case, im afraid of dying more than living. I would think if I have courage to kill myself, I would rather live in my life with the courage.
Second, I think my friend less than my family at first... I don't know, My family is not poor, but not rich, and friendly.. just Im the one of ordinary family. So if I disappear, nothing happen to the world, Im just wondering who will cry for me... but...
That's im sure, I have parents, brother, sister, and sister-in-law, brother-in-law, two nieces and one nephew. If I die, how will they feel???
be happy?? or crying?? I don't know, Im not sure.. but just, I can't forget when I saw my father's tear when my grandma died, and my mother's tear when I was young that i didn't know what happened at that time.. So I don't want to make them such like that. (Oh.. You might misunderstand, Nobody may think im a good son... Im not a good person such like that. Good son. Anybody can't be a good son. I acknowledge that my father is only one of a good son who i have ever known before.)
That's why I don't kill my self.
Third.. I have still someting to want to do. I want to learn this, and that, I want to experience this, and I want to close these people and those people...
However, Im still blood type "O" which is similar shy blood type "A", and lazy, so I didn't come out yet, but if I have a chance, I want to do this and that, I just agree that the life is short but a lot of things to do....
But, it has something to wonder about me.
Im not a melancholiac? Uni and Lee Eun-Ju, a melancholia made them kill theirseves.
Unfortunately, I have also melancholia. Im sure that im more than them. At least im not less than them.
So, Why I don't kill myself...(Hmmm.. a little bit weird question... -0-)
That's one of my favorite story here.
Jin Dae-Je who was Information and Communication Minister heard from a foreigner how to have a full score life. A full score is 100.
Then he said the story at a party.
The first,
You attach numbers to the English Alphabet. A is 1, B is 2... like this.
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26
And then,
Words are exchanged for numbers and given marks.
He asked, "If you work hard, Is it possible?" 'Work Hard' was 98(23+15+18+11+8+1+18+4=98)
"Then knowledge?" Knowledge was 96(11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5)
"Then luck?", Luck was 47(12+21+3+11=47)
"Then if you have a lot of money?" Money was 72(13+15+14+5+25=72)
"Then if you have leadership?" Leadership was 97(12+5+1+4+5+18+19+8+9+16=97)
"Well, then how can use make a full score life?"
Well, what is the answer...??
In the world is looked differently as how to think. That's why everybody has individuality and personality.
That'll be good to think about depressed mind or happy mind....
The important thing is, not to spoil ownself.
That's why I don't kill myself even though Im depressed.
If you who read this think about suiside,
I hope you think who you are for you, and for family.. who you are for them. Or for friends who are so close to you, or someone who has realationship deeply with you, etc.... I hope you think like that..
But, don't think what worth of your being is in the world. Actually, there is no reason for worth of your being in the world.
If you don't find your meaning from anybody, it's up to you to kill yourself or whatever you want...
But, just you scold yourself such to live pitifully. and before you die, just try once to make only one good memory with them. After that if you die, you don't feel lonely while you go to the hell!!!
Ah... I talked a lot today.... Im dizzy... -0- Shit...
To see her the first time, of course, I just remember she acted a character who had princess disease on TV.
And, later, she entered my highschool, and she was my junior(of course, I didn't see her when she went to the school. I want to say just the same school.)
And the festival of school, I who was not interested in celebrities stared at her vacantly cause by her dancing. And, it made a deep impression on my mind....
But, why.... she had to die.....
A few years ago, actress Lee Eun-Ju also killed herself. She was one of my favorite actress, that's why I was shocked, but this time, Im not shocked such as Lee Eun-Ju.
But, just...
To kill herself makes me feel really sorry....
Suiside...
Are there anybody who had "Never" thought about SUISIDE???
Me???
For sure, I also had thought about suiside. Like you guys, in my highschool days...
A stress about to study, friend relationship, family, etc, I think not only me.....
I have a lot of memories about highschool, but it was true that i was really hard at that time.
Of course, nowadays, i just smile when I think about that.
When I serverd in the army once or twice, when I worked once(huk!!!! I didn't know it's so many.. .-0-)
Anyway, I sometimes think like that, but I think why I should kill myself... it's my recently mind...
That's the reason why I don't kill myself...
First, I have no courage to kill myself. Actually, is there any hard thing such as living in the life, in my case, im afraid of dying more than living. I would think if I have courage to kill myself, I would rather live in my life with the courage.
Second, I think my friend less than my family at first... I don't know, My family is not poor, but not rich, and friendly.. just Im the one of ordinary family. So if I disappear, nothing happen to the world, Im just wondering who will cry for me... but...
That's im sure, I have parents, brother, sister, and sister-in-law, brother-in-law, two nieces and one nephew. If I die, how will they feel???
be happy?? or crying?? I don't know, Im not sure.. but just, I can't forget when I saw my father's tear when my grandma died, and my mother's tear when I was young that i didn't know what happened at that time.. So I don't want to make them such like that. (Oh.. You might misunderstand, Nobody may think im a good son... Im not a good person such like that. Good son. Anybody can't be a good son. I acknowledge that my father is only one of a good son who i have ever known before.)
That's why I don't kill my self.
Third.. I have still someting to want to do. I want to learn this, and that, I want to experience this, and I want to close these people and those people...
However, Im still blood type "O" which is similar shy blood type "A", and lazy, so I didn't come out yet, but if I have a chance, I want to do this and that, I just agree that the life is short but a lot of things to do....
But, it has something to wonder about me.
Im not a melancholiac? Uni and Lee Eun-Ju, a melancholia made them kill theirseves.
Unfortunately, I have also melancholia. Im sure that im more than them. At least im not less than them.
So, Why I don't kill myself...(Hmmm.. a little bit weird question... -0-)
That's one of my favorite story here.
Jin Dae-Je who was Information and Communication Minister heard from a foreigner how to have a full score life. A full score is 100.
Then he said the story at a party.
The first,
You attach numbers to the English Alphabet. A is 1, B is 2... like this.
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26
And then,
Words are exchanged for numbers and given marks.
He asked, "If you work hard, Is it possible?" 'Work Hard' was 98(23+15+18+11+8+1+18+4=98)
"Then knowledge?" Knowledge was 96(11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5)
"Then luck?", Luck was 47(12+21+3+11=47)
"Then if you have a lot of money?" Money was 72(13+15+14+5+25=72)
"Then if you have leadership?" Leadership was 97(12+5+1+4+5+18+19+8+9+16=97)
"Well, then how can use make a full score life?"
Well, what is the answer...??
In the world is looked differently as how to think. That's why everybody has individuality and personality.
That'll be good to think about depressed mind or happy mind....
The important thing is, not to spoil ownself.
That's why I don't kill myself even though Im depressed.
If you who read this think about suiside,
I hope you think who you are for you, and for family.. who you are for them. Or for friends who are so close to you, or someone who has realationship deeply with you, etc.... I hope you think like that..
But, don't think what worth of your being is in the world. Actually, there is no reason for worth of your being in the world.
If you don't find your meaning from anybody, it's up to you to kill yourself or whatever you want...
But, just you scold yourself such to live pitifully. and before you die, just try once to make only one good memory with them. After that if you die, you don't feel lonely while you go to the hell!!!
Ah... I talked a lot today.... Im dizzy... -0- Shit...
